clean boxers

It was this past Tuesday at roughly 11:15pm.  I had just turned off the HD and was in the kitchen when I heard this god awful shit splatter scream just outside the open kitchen window.  And then another.  And then another.  WTF. In all my years, and I have many, I have never heard anything so bloodcurdling and I've watched every Halloween Movie and eaten turnip without gobs of butter and had county fair cheap beer hangovers.

Holy crap!  It sounded like John Bobbitt must have sounded when he woke up after Lorena had pruned his hedge. 

My immediate thought was this was lurking in the woods looking for a late lunch

"i like greasy human"

or this with a bad heroin hangover

"i'm pissed as hell and wanna kill something"

or perhaps this before she found Bill.

"don't fuck with me"

After sharing the experience with the locals we were told with a wink and nod that it might be a puma or raccoon on crack.  My cynical nature said "Puma - no way".  "Cracked up raccoon - maybe".

However, the all knowing Google and YouTube affiliate suggested this

and it has my vote. 

The back story is that we have a fox litter near the house consisting of these wild and ferocious ankle chewing beasts.

Fuzz and Butts

How can such a tiny fur-ball be so freaking loud!! 

You can bet I won't be stepping outside after dark without one of these anytime soon.

"go ahead, make my day homey"